How to Know When to Breakup: Making Future Plans

How to Know When to Breakup: Making Future Plans

Are you feeling confused about your relationship and wondering if you should breakup? My new video series ‘How to Know When to Breakup’, will help you figure out how and if you should end your relationship. In the second video of the series, I talk about another sign that it might be time to breakup–a resistance to making future plans. Recap: “Hey, this is Janelle Klander, creator of BreakupSchool.com and you are watching the “How to Know When to Breakup” video series to help you know when and if you should breakup in your relationship. In this video we’re going to talk about what it means when you start feeling resistance towards making future plans with your partner. Is this happening to you? Alright, so let’s go back to the very beginning, when you first met. You were constantly making plans. You couldn’t wait to do and see things together. It felt right. Then all of a sudden it stopped feeling natural to make plans. In fact you’re not even sure you want to make plans past next week. At the same time you might be terrified to let go and you may have not wanted to admit any of this until just right now. First, I want to let you know that what you’re feeling is completely normal. It’s hard to want to make plans with someone if you’re not sure you want to be with them. It’s not your fault and there really isn’t anything you can do about it. Most relationships don’t last forever. So if you feel like yours has an expiration date, then trust...
25 Things to Do For Yourself Post-Breakup: Part 5

25 Things to Do For Yourself Post-Breakup: Part 5

Are you looking for something that can help you get through the pain of a breakup? Spending time on yourself after a relationship ends has proven to help with the healing process. To help you follow this advice, I’ve made up a list of things you can do for yourself after a breakup.  This is the last week of the ongoing series “25 Things You Can Do For Yourself Post-Breakup” and these are therefore going to be my last suggestions to you. If you missed the previous weeks or would like to remind yourself of my other suggestions, head on back to weeks One, Two, Three, and Four. To continue with our list, here are the final five things you can do for yourself after a breakup. 21. Spend time with a pet. After a breakup, you are likely feeling pretty lonely, but spending time with a pet can help ease that loneliness.No matter what kind of animal you have, being with your pet will make you happy. And if you don’t have a pet of your own, you can always spend time with a friend’s pet or volunteer at an animal shelter. I know there are positions available which actually require you to pet bunnies and play with kittens.  22. Plan weekend getaway A weekend getaway could be exactly what you need to put your memories of your ex in the past. Hop on a plan and take a trip abroad if you have the money. If you’re like most of us, however, money likely isn’t something you’re swimming in. If so, you can always do something simple. For example:...
How to Know When to Breakup: Finding Others Attractive

How to Know When to Breakup: Finding Others Attractive

Are you feeling confused about your relationship and wondering if you should breakup? My new video series ‘How to Know When to Breakup’, will help you figure out how and if you should end your relationship. In the first video of the series, I talk about one sign that it might be time to breakup–finding others attractive. Here’s a word for word recap of the video: “Hi, I’m Janelle Klander, creator of BreakupSchool.com, and you are watching the ‘How to Know When to Breakup’ video series to help you know when and if you should breakup. In this video we’re going to talk about what it means when you start finding others attractive. So you’re starting to notice the hotties around you. This could be a sign that you’re getting close to the end of your relationship. It’s normal to start feeling attracted to other people when you’re less into your own relationship. ‘Cause deep down you know you have to keep your options open and forgetting that you’re in a relationship sometimes is part of this. Personally, I know that when I’m at the end of my relationship I start finding guys more and more attractive. I don’t freak out. I just take it as a sign to start gradually accepting that the relationship is probably over. So it doesn’t mean you need to breakup right now, but it probably means that you can start preparing yourself for the end. Has this happened to you?” But maybe you’ve watched the video and are still unsure about whether you should breakup or not. If that’s the case, sign up...
Halloween Costumes: Become Your Goddess Self

Halloween Costumes: Become Your Goddess Self

We’ve made it halfway through October and Halloween is just around the corner. Do you have your Halloween costume chosen yet? If not, I have an original idea for a costume that could help you attract good things in your everyday, uncostumed, un-Halloweeny, life. Interested? When I was young, I would dress up in the fanciest clothes I could find and pretend I was an adult. I would wear my mother’s high heels and strut around my room, feeling powerful and amazing. Did you ever do anything like that? I’m sure, if you think about it, you have at least one memory that’s similar. There is power in what we imagine and how we see ourselves. When we see ourselves as weak or insecure, then that is what we become. Similarly, when we see ourselves as powerful and independent, we become powerful and independent. When you “dress for the job you want”, you’re following this same principle. So, why not take this trick and apply it to your Halloween costume?  Then your costume will do double duty as both a fun outfit for a night of partying and a tool of empowerment. That’s called multi-tasking. One way to do this is by dressing up as your Goddess Self. Don’t know what your Goddess Self is? Your Goddess Self is the most powerful, ideal version of you that exists. She is beautiful and can look however you imagine her. She can be wearing jeans or a floor-length ball gown; full makeup or absolutely no makeup at all–whatever makes you feel utterly amazing, sexy, and confidant. By imagining and then becoming...
Hang Out with Janelle: Slam Up Ladies Talk Relationships, Breakups and STDs

Hang Out with Janelle: Slam Up Ladies Talk Relationships, Breakups and STDs

I met Cali and Emily from Slam Up, when they were on tour and made a stop in Minneapolis. I immediately loved them as they started singing Salt N Pepa’s – None of your Business. Aside from our mutual love of Salt N Pepa, I totally vibed with what these ladies had going on. Cali and Emily describe Slam Up with- WHERE POETRY MEETS COMEDY. It’s true. The show bounces back and forth from ridiculous laughter to stiring your soul. It was a pleasure to be in their audience. I had to get these ladies to hang out with me and talk about relationships, breakups and STDs. So here it is….. Wanna listen to what they go going on and/or donate to make their tour possible? Click here.  itunes click here.  Buy the “Potlucks and Hotfucks” shirt here.  If you are in the East Coast – Check out their tour. THE SAME BRAIN TOUR 2014 SEPTEMBER: WED 3rd | 7 PM | donation | The Batcave (Montclair, NJ) THU 4th | 7 PM | donation | Bluestockings (Manhattan, NYC) FRI 5th | 7:30 PM | $5-$10 | The Institute Library (New Haven, CT) SAT 6th | 8 PM | $10 ($5 w/ student id) | The Buttonwood Tree (Middleton, CT) MON 8th | 8 PM | $5-$10 | 95 Empire (Providence, RI) WED 10th | 8 PM | $10 ($5 w/ student id) | Patterson Creations (Attleboro, MA) THU 11th | 7 PM | free | Fazenda Coffee Roasters (Jamaica Plain, MA) FRI 12th | 7:30 PM | free | Arts at the Armory (Sommerville, MA) SAT 13th | 8 PM | free | Vena’s Fizz House (Portland, ME) SUN 14th | 6:30 PM | TBA | Feature @ Rhythmic Cypher Poetry (Portland, ME) TUE 16th | 8 PM...
25 Things You Can Do Post-Breakup: Part 4

25 Things You Can Do Post-Breakup: Part 4

This is the fourth week of the ongoing series, 25 Things You Can Do For Yourself Post-Breakup. By now you should have a good idea that doing something for yourself post-breakup is the best way to begin getting over your past relationship quickly and with the least amount of pain.  If you missed the previous weeks or would like to remind yourself of my other suggestions, head on back to weeks One, Two, and Three. To continue with our list, here are five more things you can do for yourself that will make the healing process after a breakup that much easier.  16) Read a book Escape from the world for a little bit by reading a book. Interested in a story with a powerful leading lady? Books like that will help you remember how strong you are and make you realize that you too can defeat any obstacle. Or maybe you want to read a sad or romantic book? These kinds of stories can be great if you are looking to have a good cry. Releasing the negative emotions you’ve been feeling by doing this is always more helpful than you would expect.  17) Journaling Or if reading isn’t your thing, why don’t you try writing in a journal? Journaling is another great way to cleanse yourself of negative emotions. Find an empty notebook and just write the first thing that comes to mind. That thought will then lead to another and soon you will be releasing all of your pain and anger in a flood of words. When the words stop, you’ll be in a much better place emotionally....