What do your Dreams Mean? (Video Included)

What do you dreams mean? How can you work with them for your own good? Your dreams give you important messages about what may need attention in your waking life.  Have you experienced this? In this video Ora North and I chat about how you can work with your dreams for your benefit. Comment below — Do have experience with working with your dreams? What did you learn from this... read more

Interview with Barbra Ignatiev

I met Barbra, a painter living in Oakland, CA, during a business program a few years back. I liked her style and she became my accountability buddy for the next year. As a painter, she uses color to help people draw out what is vibrant about themselves. Currently, she is working on a series of figure study paintings that explore expressive movement and color combinations. Isn’t her work gorgeous? I wanted all of you to meet her too, so I asked her a few questions so you and I can get to know her better. Because she’s awesome, Barbra also agreed to make a fun and inspiring wallpaper to help keep you positive throughout the day. It can be downloaded at the end of this post. But first, the questions! 1) Many readers are interested in what makes a good relationship work. Can you tell us your recipe for a good relationship? For almost 10 years, my husband and I have had a relationship built on silliness and ridiculousness so that helps. I think not taking yourself too seriously helps with just about any relationship. Many of the world’s problems could be solved just with a good laugh, just maybe… I also like to set up expectations for things on a daily basis so we’re both on the same page. Conflicting expectations can really screw up any moment. Oh and don’t forget communication that is honest and meaningful and not all about you. I think all of this applies to any relationship, not just romantic ones. 2) What’s your go-to activity (or non activity) when you are feeling stressed?... read more

Relationship Advice from Fashion Blogger, Kathleen Harper

Relationship Advice from Fashion Blogger, Kathleen Harper If you are a fan of fashion and style blogs, you might have heard of Kathleen Harper, the woman behind Kat’s Fashion Fix. Recently, I had the chance to ask Kathleen a few questions about fashion, long-distance relationships, and interracial dating. Her answers were both honest and full of good advice. Check them out! 1) Short Bio: Hi everyone! My name is Kathleen and I’m a 22 year-old fashion blogger from Chicago. I’m currently  a senior at Elon University, which is located in North Carolina. Although I’m presently living in the  South, I’m a city girl through and through. I love Chicago and I’ve also lived in LA and New York  City for a short period of time. Obviously fashion is a huge passion of mine and in LA and NY I was lucky enough to get internships in the industry. In fact this past summer I worked for The Daily Front Row, the official magazine of New York Fashion Week, and it was a blast. I got to attend movie premiers, red carpet events, interview movie stars, and even go to a ball – how cool is that? In May I’m moving back to The Big Apple to pursue a career in fashion journalism – wish me luck! I started my beloved blog, Kat’s Fashion Fix, in 2012 as a creative outlet for me to be able to share my love of fashion with friends. Sharing my style and my life with my followers has turned out to be a very rewarding experience and I wouldn’t have it any other way! 2) How did you and your boyfriend meet? I always have so much fun telling... read more

How to Know When to Breakup: Making Future Plans

Are you feeling confused about your relationship and wondering if you should breakup? My new video series ‘How to Know When to Breakup’, will help you figure out how and if you should end your relationship. In the second video of the series, I talk about another sign that it might be time to breakup–a resistance to making future plans. Recap: “Hey, this is Janelle Klander, creator of BreakupSchool.com and you are watching the “How to Know When to Breakup” video series to help you know when and if you should breakup in your relationship. In this video we’re going to talk about what it means when you start feeling resistance towards making future plans with your partner. Is this happening to you? Alright, so let’s go back to the very beginning, when you first met. You were constantly making plans. You couldn’t wait to do and see things together. It felt right. Then all of a sudden it stopped feeling natural to make plans. In fact you’re not even sure you want to make plans past next week. At the same time you might be terrified to let go and you may have not wanted to admit any of this until just right now. First, I want to let you know that what you’re feeling is completely normal. It’s hard to want to make plans with someone if you’re not sure you want to be with them. It’s not your fault and there really isn’t anything you can do about it. Most relationships don’t last forever. So if you feel like yours has an expiration date, then trust... read more

25 Things to Do For Yourself Post-Breakup: Part 5

Are you looking for something that can help you get through the pain of a breakup? Spending time on yourself after a relationship ends has proven to help with the healing process. To help you follow this advice, I’ve made up a list of things you can do for yourself after a breakup.  This is the last week of the ongoing series “25 Things You Can Do For Yourself Post-Breakup” and these are therefore going to be my last suggestions to you. If you missed the previous weeks or would like to remind yourself of my other suggestions, head on back to weeks One, Two, Three, and Four. To continue with our list, here are the final five things you can do for yourself after a breakup. 21. Spend time with a pet. After a breakup, you are likely feeling pretty lonely, but spending time with a pet can help ease that loneliness.No matter what kind of animal you have, being with your pet will make you happy. And if you don’t have a pet of your own, you can always spend time with a friend’s pet or volunteer at an animal shelter. I know there are positions available which actually require you to pet bunnies and play with kittens.  22. Plan weekend getaway A weekend getaway could be exactly what you need to put your memories of your ex in the past. Hop on a plan and take a trip abroad if you have the money. If you’re like most of us, however, money likely isn’t something you’re swimming in. If so, you can always do something simple. For example:... read more

How to Know When to Breakup: Finding Others Attractive

Are you feeling confused about your relationship and wondering if you should breakup? My new video series ‘How to Know When to Breakup’, will help you figure out how and if you should end your relationship. In the first video of the series, I talk about one sign that it might be time to breakup–finding others attractive. Here’s a word for word recap of the video: “Hi, I’m Janelle Klander, creator of BreakupSchool.com, and you are watching the ‘How to Know When to Breakup’ video series to help you know when and if you should breakup. In this video we’re going to talk about what it means when you start finding others attractive. So you’re starting to notice the hotties around you. This could be a sign that you’re getting close to the end of your relationship. It’s normal to start feeling attracted to other people when you’re less into your own relationship. ‘Cause deep down you know you have to keep your options open and forgetting that you’re in a relationship sometimes is part of this. Personally, I know that when I’m at the end of my relationship I start finding guys more and more attractive. I don’t freak out. I just take it as a sign to start gradually accepting that the relationship is probably over. So it doesn’t mean you need to breakup right now, but it probably means that you can start preparing yourself for the end. Has this happened to you?” But maybe you’ve watched the video and are still unsure about whether you should breakup or not. If that’s the case, sign up... read more

Halloween Costumes: Become Your Goddess Self

We’ve made it halfway through October and Halloween is just around the corner. Do you have your Halloween costume chosen yet? If not, I have an original idea for a costume that could help you attract good things in your everyday, uncostumed, un-Halloweeny, life. Interested? When I was young, I would dress up in the fanciest clothes I could find and pretend I was an adult. I would wear my mother’s high heels and strut around my room, feeling powerful and amazing. Did you ever do anything like that? I’m sure, if you think about it, you have at least one memory that’s similar. There is power in what we imagine and how we see ourselves. When we see ourselves as weak or insecure, then that is what we become. Similarly, when we see ourselves as powerful and independent, we become powerful and independent. When you “dress for the job you want”, you’re following this same principle. So, why not take this trick and apply it to your Halloween costume?  Then your costume will do double duty as both a fun outfit for a night of partying and a tool of empowerment. That’s called multi-tasking. One way to do this is by dressing up as your Goddess Self. Don’t know what your Goddess Self is? Your Goddess Self is the most powerful, ideal version of you that exists. She is beautiful and can look however you imagine her. She can be wearing jeans or a floor-length ball gown; full makeup or absolutely no makeup at all–whatever makes you feel utterly amazing, sexy, and confidant. By imagining and then becoming... read more

Breakup School Interviews a Single Girl

Single Girl is the woman behind 1 Year of Single, an online blog devoted to experiences in dating, breakup, and recovery. Some time ago, she decided to spend an entire year as a single girl and share that experience with the world. Recently, I decided to talk to her and get her take on how her decision to take a break from the dating scene has not only changed, but improved, her life. —— Breakup School: What made you decide to spend a year single? Single Girl: I wanted a long stretch of guilt-free time to spend on the healthy development of myself. See, at the time I was in the middle of a painful, drama-filled relationship with a guy who was going through a divorce. It was a situation that I swore I would never get myself into, but I had discarded my own intuition for advice from friends and went out with him anyway. Of course it was a huge mistake and I ended up falling for the guy, who soon-after returned to his bipolar, cheating wife. I not only told him to lose my number, but I swore off every facet of dating for a year. It was at that point that I allowed myself to both recognize and embrace the full scope of my anger at the years I wasted in not listening to my own intuition on men who were more of a mess than I was. And sadly it all originally stemmed from my mother —  a mentally unstable woman who raised me to believe that a husband would give my life value.... read more

Hang Out with Janelle: Slam Up Ladies Talk Relationships, Breakups and STDs

I met Cali and Emily from Slam Up, when they were on tour and made a stop in Minneapolis. I immediately loved them as they started singing Salt N Pepa’s – None of your Business. Aside from our mutual love of Salt N Pepa, I totally vibed with what these ladies had going on. Cali and Emily describe Slam Up with- WHERE POETRY MEETS COMEDY. It’s true. The show bounces back and forth from ridiculous laughter to stiring your soul. It was a pleasure to be in their audience. I had to get these ladies to hang out with me and talk about relationships, breakups and STDs. So here it is….. Wanna listen to what they go going on and/or donate to make their tour possible? Click here.  itunes click here.  Buy the “Potlucks and Hotfucks” shirt here.  If you are in the East Coast – Check out their tour. THE SAME BRAIN TOUR 2014 SEPTEMBER: WED 3rd | 7 PM | donation | The Batcave (Montclair, NJ) THU 4th | 7 PM | donation | Bluestockings (Manhattan, NYC) FRI 5th | 7:30 PM | $5-$10 | The Institute Library (New Haven, CT) SAT 6th | 8 PM | $10 ($5 w/ student id) | The Buttonwood Tree (Middleton, CT) MON 8th | 8 PM | $5-$10 | 95 Empire (Providence, RI) WED 10th | 8 PM | $10 ($5 w/ student id) | Patterson Creations (Attleboro, MA) THU 11th | 7 PM | free | Fazenda Coffee Roasters (Jamaica Plain, MA) FRI 12th | 7:30 PM | free | Arts at the Armory (Sommerville, MA) SAT 13th | 8 PM | free | Vena’s Fizz House (Portland, ME) SUN 14th | 6:30 PM | TBA | Feature @ Rhythmic Cypher Poetry (Portland, ME) TUE 16th | 8 PM... read more

25 Things You Can Do Post-Breakup: Part 4

This is the fourth week of the ongoing series, 25 Things You Can Do For Yourself Post-Breakup. By now you should have a good idea that doing something for yourself post-breakup is the best way to begin getting over your past relationship quickly and with the least amount of pain.  If you missed the previous weeks or would like to remind yourself of my other suggestions, head on back to weeks One, Two, and Three. To continue with our list, here are five more things you can do for yourself that will make the healing process after a breakup that much easier.  16) Read a book Escape from the world for a little bit by reading a book. Interested in a story with a powerful leading lady? Books like that will help you remember how strong you are and make you realize that you too can defeat any obstacle. Or maybe you want to read a sad or romantic book? These kinds of stories can be great if you are looking to have a good cry. Releasing the negative emotions you’ve been feeling by doing this is always more helpful than you would expect.  17) Journaling Or if reading isn’t your thing, why don’t you try writing in a journal? Journaling is another great way to cleanse yourself of negative emotions. Find an empty notebook and just write the first thing that comes to mind. That thought will then lead to another and soon you will be releasing all of your pain and anger in a flood of words. When the words stop, you’ll be in a much better place emotionally.... read more

Breakup Recovery Program Helps You Find the Perfect Partner

  I’m Janelle Klander and I am a coach, a healer, and a wedding officiant. My main goal is to empower women to live their dream lives and inspire them to be authentic. I decided to specialize in breakups because so many people were coming to me that were still stuck in a past relationship and their past relationship was affecting their present and their future. Not just in relationships, but in other areas of their life. I wanted to help these people, give them an easier way, an easier process to get through this healing. I’ve had over a decade of experience with breakups and I’m really grateful for all of those relationships and all the breakups. They’ve taught me so much. Looking back on that, I wish that I was given a process. I wish that I was given encouragement and empowerment, as opposed to feeling like a failure. Essentially people want to be with a partner. We have that yearning. We want to be with somebody. We want to share these experiences in life. But if you’re repeating the same patterns over and over again then you’re not going to have that opportunity to do that. You’re going to keep dating that same person. Or the same things are going to come up for you. So if you’re really serious about meeting that perfect partner then you have to do internal work. I created this program “Free Yourself From Your Ex in 30 Days or Less” because I wanted to give people an opportunity to move through their breakup in an easy, quick way instead of... read more

25 Things You Can Do Post-Breakup: Part 3

Have you just gone through a breakup? If you have, then please give yourself some time to grieve the relationship and be emotional. Breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend is difficult and it’s best to let those emotions out. Sooner rather than later, however, you will have to get back out into the world and move on with your life. And the best way to do so is to do something for yourself after a breakup.  I’ve compiled a list of 25 things you can do for yourself after a breakup. But, just so you don’t feel like you have to do everything at once, I’ve split that list into 5 parts. This is Part Three. If you’d like to read previous parts, head on over to Parts One and Two. But let’s get back to the list. Here are 5 more things you can do for yourself post-breakup. 11) Dance Get up, turn on some music, and dance to the beat. Dancing combines the benefits of both exercise and music. And by that I mean, the movement of your body will help you lose weight and reduce stress, while the music pumps you up emotionally. For added benefit, make sure the music is properly empowering. Some feel good lyrics are just what you need.  12) Hug someone When feeling emotional after a breakup, who wouldn’t want a good hug? Find a friend or a family member and give them a squeeze. It’s emotionally affirming to know that you have someone in your life who will just give you a hug whenever you need it. Also, getting a... read more

25 Things to Do For Yourself Post-Breakup: Part 2

In a relationship you spend a lot of time doing things for your significant other. And that’s fine! But once you’ve gone through a breakup and that person is out of your life then it’s time to stop putting them first. Now it is all about you and to begin practicing that, start by doing something just for yourself after your breakup. I’ve made a list of things you can do after a breakup to help you with this, broken into a series of five parts. Of the series, this is Part 2. If you’re interested in learning about more things you can do for yourself after a breakup, head on back to Part 1. After reading that, you can continue reading here. Some more things you can do for yourself post-breakup are: 6) Go for a walk Get out in the fresh air by taking a walk. Whether the walk is long or short, the act of stretching your legs and moving around will help push all of the doubts and fears and pain of your breakup to the side for a little bit and clear your head. Going for a walk will also be exercise so it will do both you, and your body, some good. 7) Go shopping Another option is to get out your wallet and head for the shops for some retail therapy. Shopping is a great distraction from a breakup and can be a lot of fun. Buy yourself a new dress, a nice necklace, or an interesting book. You don’t want to go crazy and start throwing your money away, but spending... read more

5 Reasons to Turn Around your Finances After a breakup!

I left an 8 year marriage to start from scratch in 2008. I made many financial mistakes getting into and out of that relationship including marrying $60,000 worth of debt and not paying attention to countless red flags. I also learned some incredible lessons from paying that debt off in 2 years to thriving financially after the relationship ended. I’m a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. We are only to pay attention. You may be worried or heartbroken or both. You’re possibly kicking yourself either for not noticing the red flags in your relationship sooner or for not behaving differently somehow to save the relationship. Stop that now. Stop blaming yourself for everything. It’s time to treat yourself with kindness, sweetheart! One of the biggest worries for women after a breakup is financial. It is also the #1 reason we stay in toxic relationships much longer than we should. Assuming you are newly or not-so-newly single…where do you go from here? One of the most satisfying things you can do is take care of yourself financially. Nothing gives you inner strength quite like being the Hero of your own life. It’s not as hard as you think. This the best time for reflection and figuring out who you really are and who you want to be. There is nothing quite as sexy as a confident and vibrant woman who takes care of her own business. Use this time as a gift to yourself. Your life is worth this effort. Nurture your financial well-being. Here are the reasons why: 1) Debt-Free and Worry-Free: Getting your financial house... read more

Breakup Horoscopes: Moving On for the 12 Sun Signs

Breakups are difficult to go through for everyone, but everyone deals with them differently. How do the twelve different sun signs react to the end of a relationship and is there any advice that can be given for each type? Aries: Your breakups may be characterized by thunder and vengeance, but they also pass quickly. If you are the dumper, you will want to get revenge on your ex then move on. And if you are the dumpee, you will still somehow get revenge on your ex and move on. The keyword here is to get active. Once you find something to do or a new goal to go after, you’ll be fine. And, if possible, try to avoid revenge as best you can as well. Taurus: You like structure and a schedule so you tend to hang on to things longer than most. As a Taurus, you are most likely not the one that initiated this breakup either, unless you were really pushed. If your ex hasn’t discussed this breakup in advance, you are likely feeling extremely resistant to it as well. Just this once, try to let things go gracefully. Realize that there is nothing you can do and that change is okay. As a Taurus, once you decide to give up on a relationship, there will be no turning back. Gemini: You will argue with your ex and with yourself. There may be some confusion about whether your breakup is actually the end of your relationship, since you will no doubt feel a great deal of resistance to the idea. You may very well talk the... read more